The mental health field has come a long way in unearthing the reality of sex abuse in our culture. Judith Herman's work in her landmark book, Trauma and Recovery, laid a foundation for understanding the impact of the trauma of sex abuse. Ellen Bass and Laura Davis through their book, Courage to Heal, opened the door for healing to those who have experienced sex abuse. John Briere with his research has produced statistical information and scientific measures that aid in treatment. Current understandings of the impact of trauma upon the brain provide even more evidence that sexual abuse perpetrates devastation.
With this increased freedom to break personal and cultural denial, and the accompanying new research about the impact of the trauma of sex abuse, comes the need for a deeper paradigm beyond the traditional use of recovery in healing.
Not just recovery or healing, but restoration
In 1935 when Bill Wilson founded AA, the first 12 step program, the concept was cutting edge. An entire generation of people in captivity to drugs and/or alcohol was able to make amazing steps towards freedom from the addictions that plagued them. The 12 step approach is based on the premise that if you admit powerlessness over the substance or behavior that is controlling your life, you have a key to freedom from it. And indeed the program has equipped thousands of people to break destructive habits. However, we suggest it is time for an additional paradigm that points to acquiring power, not giving it up.
The twelve step program is actually a transference of dependency. The participant moves from a substance addiction to dependence on a group and a system of management. It doesn't recover anything. Lemanski writes: "To transfer dependence on chemically addictive substances to emotional or psychological dependence on a group or recovery program is not recovery in the true sense of the word" (Lemanski, 1997). Twelve steppers are actually trapped within the program itself. They may have recovered from the visible symptoms of the addiction, but have not been restored to the full potential of what they were created capable of being.
There is great paradox in asking people to admit powerlessness in order to gain empowerment. The truth is not that we are powerless to overcome addictions or trauma. The truth is that the twelve step framework doesn't provide the pathway to the power we have. We submit that the power we seek is not found in a recovery program, but in a restoration paradigm.
Restoration declares that the power to not only override but rewrite unhealthy coping systems is available to you. The process becomes one of uncovering and restoring to your use your internal capabilities found in authentic identity that will provide direction, strength, and yes, even power.
In the current recovery paradigm there is no route for achieving freedom. At the end of the day you are stuck in a label and stuck with only a method of containment. The recovery paradigm provides liberty, not freedom. Liberty means simply that we are not oppressed. Freedom means we are the author of our experience (Block, 2002). The restoration paradigm, on the other hand, provides freedom. Freedom asks us to invent our own steps - not follow the recipe of others. It means we believe we are constituting or creating the world in which we live (Block, 2002).
When we seek restoration and not just recovery, we move from management of the symptoms to conquering the cause of the symptoms. Cognitive Behavioral Theory has shown us that our behaviors are driven by belief systems, wounds, needs and longings. We do what we do based on what we think, feel or need. Long lasting and life-giving change of behavior is accomplished when we acknowledge and address internal needs and change unhealthy belief systems. When we simply work to change behavior without addressing the underlying drives, we are at constant war with our selves.
Once a week the staff of Connections conduct a self-awareness group for female adolescents in our local juvenile detention facility. Many of the girls we meet proclaim weekly, "I will not be back here again; I'm not going to do drugs anymore." They enroll in traditional behavior management programs and are out of detention for a time. Their intentions are strong; they do try not to use. However when the internal message or need that the drugs seem to answer becomes too much for their "management" skills the internal war resumes. The unprocessed emotional response or unmet need or belief system swamps the external controls, and they are cycled back into detention because they resorted back to using drugs.
A 12 step program focuses on managing the symptoms reflected in the addictive behavior. That focus leaves the underlying motivating needs or beliefs in control. It denies where the power is really being experienced. The internal systems have the power and 12 steppers are equipped only to control the reactions to their internal systems as seen in their unhealthy behaviors. The only personal empowerment 12 steppers receive is how to control the behavior of the addiction.
In an emotional conversation with a friend of mine, a 12 stepper, I experienced firsthand how the tactics he learned in his recovery program stifled emotional growth and the possibility of restoration. When our conversation included deep questions and strong emotions, he automatically began to use one of his techniques to manage the emotion. He had been taught that to prevent his addiction trigger, he had to control (actually override) the strong emotional response he was having in the moment. With his AA tactic, he did prevent himself from moving to his addiction of choice, but denied his emotions and my emotions embedded in the conversation and did not address the underlying issue. The moment was calmed, but the issue will resurface because the emotions were not completed, nor any issues resolved.
The 12 step approach actually renders one powerless to change from the inside out as it fails to recognize the driving power of a person's internal belief systems. The fallacy: we are powerless. The truth: we do have power. The power lies in understanding why we behave the way we do, and the power lies in making the internal changes that ultimately will change the unwanted behavior where necessary.
In a restoration paradigm we acknowledge the behavior and assign to ourselves the power to change the compulsion that drives the behavior. How? By identifying the belief system or power behind the drive and making the appropriate adjustment to realign ourselves to the truth of healthy thinking and authentic identity.
Our restoration paradigm was developed to meet the needs of the victim of childhood sexual abuse. The trauma of sex abuse causes the victim to develop a distorted view of self, her world and how she relates to it. Her authentic identity is buried under misbeliefs and maladaptive coping mechanisms. The four ranges of restoration (Refugee, Overcoming, Conquering, Identity) provide a framework through which the victim can make appropriate internal adjustments, remove the accumulated impact of sex abuse and reconnect to who she was created capable of being.
Subsequent articles will further describe the restoration paradigm.
References:
Block, Peter (2002). The Answer to How is Yes. San Francisco. Berrett-Koehler Publishers.
Lemanski, Michael, J. (1997). The Humanist. P18 - 24.
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